Happiness is a golf joke, in memory of Arnold Palmer who passed away today at age 87 in Pennsylvania

Jesus and Moses are golfing in heaven one day when they come to a par 3 hole with a very large water hazard surrounding it.

Moses plays it safe and picks a seven iron and lays up in front of the lake so that on his second shot he can easily chip onto the green.

Jesus can hardly believe it and picks a long club to go for the green. "Arnold Palmer would play a 3 wood," he says confidently. Moses disagrees and advises him to do as he has done. But Jesus says, "No, Arnold Palmer would play a 3 wood and go for the green, and so will I."

Jesus' tee shot is beautiful, but unfortunately comes up a little short and lands in the water.

Moses turns to him and says, "I told you so." And with that he walks down the fairway to the lake, parts the water, retrieves the ball, and returns it to Jesus at the tee.

"You'll be using a seven iron now, I imagine," says Moses.

"No", says Jesus. "Arnold Palmer would use the 3 wood and so will I".

Same as before, Jesus puts it in the water.

Disgusted, Moses starts down the fairway to retrieve the ball again, but Jesus stops him and says he'll do it himself.

Meanwhile play has advanced and a foursome freshly arrived in heaven comes up from behind ready to play the same hole. While Moses is apologizing for the delay, one of their party observes Jesus in the distance walking across the water and reaching in to retrieve his ball!

The guy can hardly believe his eyes and says to Moses, "Who does that guy think he is, Jesus Christ?"

And Moses turns, gives him that knowing look and says, "No, he thinks he's Arnold Palmer".  

80g of regular full-fat cheese daily linked to higher HDL cholesterol levels

That's not quite three ounces.

Reported here.

It's National Burger Day today, but we made stir-fry by mistake dontcha know

We use a Cantonese style wok with a lower base ring on a gas stove without difficulty

We grill burgers on Sunday evenings like clockwork, but not today!

And to think it was the National Day to celebrate our custom. Oops.

We made stir-fry in the wok because we had accumulated leftovers from . . . the grill!

But not beef! Pork and chicken, mostly.

Here's the basic ingredient list for our stovetop stir fry (you can get by without the celery if you have 1/4 tsp. celery seed):

2 cups leftover cooked meat, like pork and chicken, diced small without the skin or fat

1 cup fresh mushrooms, about 4 oz., diced and then sautéed in butter or oil

3/4 cup diced carrot, about 2

2/3 cup diced onion

1 green onion chopped

2/3 cup diced sweet bell pepper, orange or red

1 cup diced celery stalk, about 2

1 cup sweet baby peas or pea pods

1 can drained bamboo shoots

1 can drained sliced water chestnuts

2 cloves garlic chopped

1 tsp. grated fresh ginger root

3 slices bacon already cooked, chopped

1 cup prepared Jasmine rice in a pan, left covered off the heat (1 cup rice, 2 cups water, a little salt, brought to a boil in a heavy covered pan and then simmered on low for 20 minutes--easy peasy)

1/2 to 1 tsp. sugar

ground black pepper

San-Jay Tamari sauce

2-3 tablespoons Sesame or Canola oil

Here's the cooking order:

Heat oil in the wok OVER MEDIUM

Add carrots and stir

Add celery and stir

Add onion and stir

Add mushrooms and stir

Add garlic and stir

Add sweet pepper and stir

Add black pepper and stir

Add meats and stir

Add fresh peas or pea pods and stir,

And bamboo shoots and water chestnuts and stir,

and cover and steam 3 minutes ON MEDIUM LOW.

Then add ginger and more black pepper

Add 1/4 cup Tamari sauce and the sugar in a pool in the bottom, mix together and stir everything

Add the cooked rice and stir until well blended

Add more Tamari sauce as desired (but you want to keep the mixture on the dry side)

Stir in cooked bacon and green onion

Turn off and cover and prepare to serve immediately 

Happiness is (if you're a Kraut like me) Joerg Sprave and his most dangerous toy in the world

Video here at The Slingshot Channel, where Joerg kills a "dirtbag". Ha Ha Ha Ha.

Happiness is 2007 Heisman Trophy winner Tim Tebow signing on with the New York METS' minor league team

Congratulations and best wishes to Tim Tebow!

From the story here:

NEW YORK (FOX5NY) - The New York Mets have signed former Heisman Trophy winner Tim Tebow to a minor league contract.  The team says he will head to the Instructional League in Florida.  He is set to report on Sept. 18th.

Tebow will get a $100,000 signing bonus according to a report by the Associated Press.

The Greeks taught us "nothing too much": Especially true when ingesting Scoville units

"British chef went temporarily DEAF after eating the world's hottest noodles" says the headline at the UK Mirror.

"Ben Sumadiwiria, 22, from London, scoffed a dish with 100 bird's eye chilis crushed together, giving it a Scoville rating of 20 million".

A single Jalapeno pepper ranges from 1,000 to 20,000 Scoville units compared with the bird's eye chili at 200,000.