Happiness is making fun of politicians

 

Coffee, which makes the politician wise,

And see through all things with his half-shut eyes,

Sent up in vapours to the baron's brain

New stratagems, the radiant lock to gain.

-- Alexander Pope

Happiness is a gas burner trivet, to keep your little moka pot from tipping over on the stove

A simple but thoughtful gift and a daily reminder of the giver because a day without coffee this way is just, well, unthinkable!

Happiness is a do it yourself brick rocket stove build with the KGB Survivalist

Here.

Perfect for the old man in winter who can collect twigs but can no longer chop wood.

The best gift of all was always Tommy coming home for Christmas

Happiness is Tucker's Toofers, 2 hamburgers for 29 cents in Fondulac, Wisconsin

Originally it was 2 for 25 cents, but by the time I knew the joint in the early 1970s the "special" had gone up, like the price of the regular hamburger, to 2 for 29 cents. Food inflation was horrible in those days, as my mother often reminded me, and no one was immune.

And they're still in business:

In 1963, Rudy, Steve, and Barbara opened Tucker's Toofers at the corner of South Main Street and Pioneer Road.  The slogan then was "they're toofer 25," meaning two hamburgers for a quarter. The name Tuckers was chosen because it was the nickname of daughter Barbara, who, as a child, had a hard time staying tucked in and always kicked her blankets off. 

I've never had a bucket list, but I'm putting this place on it, for old times' sake.  

Happiness is the misty morning

When first the sun too pow'rful beams displays,

It draws up vapours which obscure its rays:

But ev'n those clouds at last adorn its way,

Reflect new glories, and augment the day.

-- Alexander Pope

Happiness is agreeing about Yes and No

In all affections she concurreth still;

If now, with man and wife to will and nill

The self-same things, a note of concord be,

I know no couple better can agree.

-- Ben Jonson (1572-1637)

Happiness is the soundtrack suite from Donovan's Reef by Cyril J. Mockridge, featuring the ever popular Pearly Shells

Here.

Except it wasn't quite yet the "Pearly Shells" we all know in its English adaptation of the original, much older Hawaiian song Pupu A O `Ewa (Shells of `Ewa). Pearly Shells as we know it is by Webley Edwards and Leon Pober. The first recording of that appears to have been by the Hawaii Calls Orchestra and Chorus in 1966, associated with Edwards' radio show of the same name, Hawaii Calls, which was releasing recordings as early as 1956 on the Capitol Records label. I don't see any evidence of the song, however, on their early releases between 1956 and 1962. Perhaps Mockridge's music score for the popular 1963 film Donovan's Reef gave Edwards the idea to ride the wave. By 1980 the song was a "best of" for the orchestra. Of all the performances I've linked to here, I like the sound and energy of Mockridge's version the best.

Happiness is Benny Bell singing The Shaving Cream Song

Here!

Shaving Cream

I have a sad story to tell you
It may hurt your feelings a bit
Last night when I walked into my bathroom
I stepped in a big pile of

{Refrain}
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave everyday and you'll always look keen

I think I'll break off with my girlfriend
Her antics are queer I'll admit
Each time I say, "Darling, I love you"
She tells me that I'm full of

{Refrain}

Our baby fell out of the window
You'd think that her head would be split
But good luck was with her that morning
She fell in a barrel of

{Refrain}

An old lady died in a bathtub
She died from a terrible fit
In order to fulfill her wishes
She was buried in six feet of

{Refrain}

When I was in France with the army
One day I looked into my kit
I thought I would find me a sandwich
But the darn thing was loaded with

{Refrain}

And now, folks, my story is ended
I think it is time I should quit
If any of you feel offended
Stick your head in a barrel of

{Refrain}

Happiness is John Wayne and Elizabeth Allen in John Ford's 1963 "Christmas" film "Donovan's Reef"

Nominated for an Oscar in 1955, Cyril J. Mockridge composed the heartwarming score for the film.

Happiness is The Irish Balladeers singing about the wake for the fighter Steve O'Donnell

Here, in what is a very melodious and polished if truncated version dating from the 1960s.

Online discussions about the origin of this song "Steve O'Donnell's Wake" and about the lyrics display very little unanimity. Different performances reflect the lack of agreement, probably because most of us who love this song just want to get right to the beer, gin, whiskey, wine and cake of the chorus. No wonder no one can remember the original words. Not even the list of libations is agreed upon.

This page, which claims to reproduce the original lyrics dating to 1889, is unfortunately itself incomprehensible in places.

For example, it should say the "crepe" is hung upon the door, not the inscrutable "crane". Hanging black crepe was the common custom to signify a house in mourning in times gone by. And what could it possibly mean for a barber to come and shave "the sluggers from his throat"? No, "The barber came and shaved the Galway slugger's throat" is no doubt more to the original sense.

O'Donnell is presumably a successful Irish fighter from Galway, a famous boxer, who has died. This is why he is beloved by the high and the low whom he had entertained. Some of these no doubt owed their good fortune to O'Donnell, betting on him as they did, which is the real reason why some now felt sorry and bad. All bets are now off. As everyone came to see him fight in life, now men of all walks have come to pay their respects that he is dead, which only burnishes the lustre of his reputation. Accordingly it appears that in the chorus "biters", which makes absolutely no sense, has been corrupted from "writers", that is, sports writers, who were accustomed to regaling their newspaper readers with O'Donnell's exploits in the ring. They are mentioned first in attendance at the wake, followed by fellow fighters, then members of the coal mining community, the experts with dynamite, then men elected to high office and finally the aspirants thereto, Irishmen all. It's a fine picture. 

On the other hand, the version by Hum and Strum, a Jew and a Catholic, dating from 1947 and afterwards, evidently recoiled at the lyric slur that O'Donnell was a Jew and changed that to "a bum". That vaudeville duo also took other liberties with the lyrics, as others have ever since. But you can hardly blame them when the lyrics seem to have been so poorly remembered in the first place.

So sing along as you will and drink whatever you're drinking to the memory of poor Stevie boy, we hardly knew him.

STEVE O'DONNELL'S WAKE.

Copyright. 1889, by Chas. D. Blake & Co.

Words and Music by Frank C. Turner.

Steve O'Donnell was a gentleman, so everybody said.

He was liked by all his friends, both rich and poor.

So of course they all felt sorry when they heard that he was dead,

And they saw a piece of crane hung on his door;

Now undertaker Feeney had the job to lay him out.

He got a casket of the finest make;

And he dressed the corpse in broadcloth, and said: Boys I have no doubt

You will all remember Steve O'Donnell's wake.

Chorus.

There were biters, there were fighters, lots of dynamiters.

There was beer, and there was whiskey, wine and cake;

There were men in high positions, there were Irish politicians.

And they all got drunk at Steve O'Donnell's wake.

A barber came and shaved his Galway sluggers from his throat,

And cut his hair a la la pompadour;

A red necktie and buttonhole bouquet was in his coat,

And a hunch of shamrocks in his hand he bore.

There was thirteen candles at his head and twenty at his side.

And lots of flowers sent for friendship's sake;

Yerra, Steve, my b'ye, why did you die, the weeping widow cried.

Sure, we all felt bad at Steve O'Donnell's wake.-Chorus.

Now Mike McGovern said he thought O'Donnell was a Jew,

Of course, he only meant it for a joke;

But Patsey Mack got up his back and at McGovern flew,

And he hit him in the eye an awful poke.

Sure all hands began a-fighting then, for everyone was mad,

And blood enough was spilled to form a lake:

They knocked the corpse upon the floor and blew out all the lights,

There was murder down at Steve O'Donnell's wake.-Chorus.

The police came in and stopped the row and made them understand,

The corpse was picked up by his brother. Dan;

But someone stole the necktie that was 'round O'Donnells throat,

Tim O'Kelly said McGovern was the man.

Then McGovern's friends got crazy mad and swore they'd have his life,

O'Reilly saw he made a big mistake;

But he fought and yelled, and danced around until the cops came in

And arrested all at Steve O'Donnell's wake.-Chorus.

Happiness is the 1995 production of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice

Happiness is an invitation at Thanksgiving

 

 

Wines and cates the tables grace,

But most the kind inviter's cheerful face.

-- Alexander Pope

Happiness is a warm gun

Happiness is a 6-pack of game hens

When two game hens just won't do.

On sale no less, at Sam's Club for just $2.71 each, through November 25th.

Happiness is Roy Clark playing Malagueña

Here.

Roy Clark passed away this week at the age of 85.

Happiness is the old elephant who likes Claude Debussy

Here, then click on the speaker in the lower right of the picture for sound.

Happiness is a Chicago Metallic perforated French bread pan

Chicago Metallic Commercial II Non-Stick Perforated French Bread Pan, currently $14.97 at Amazon.

I've had this one for four years. I seem to use it whenever the weather turns cold for the first time in the fall, and then over the winter get out of the habit again. The bread it makes goes wonderfully with soup for lunch, or with some EVOO all by itself at breakfast. I often make a heartier version of French bread with a half a cup of rye flour added in to the bread flour.

Happiness is The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything, including visiting Boston in the fall

Here.

Happiness is a government worker who mocks his own sloth

Happiness is a beagle with cream cheese

Happiness is that long term statin drug use reduces heart attack and stroke incidence

Reported here:

In 2016, in a major review in the Lancet, they concluded that lowering cholesterol over five years with a cheap daily statin would prevent 1,000 heart attacks, strokes and coronary artery bypasses among 10,000 people who had already had one. It would also prevent 500 in people who were at increased risk, for instance because of high blood pressure or diabetes.

Happiness is the sight of you

Go, gentle gales, and bear my sighs along!
The birds shall cease to tune their evening song,
The winds to breathe, the waving woods to move,
And streams to murmur, ere I cease to love.
Not bubbling fountains to the thirsty swain,
Not balmy sleep to labourers faint with pain,

Not showers to larks, or sunshine to the bee,

Are half so charming as thy sight to me.

-- Alexander Pope, Autumn

Happiness is sometimes wet

Like silver coins the wet leaves gleam,

as rays of sun o'ercome the rain;

But quickly alter back to green,

as showers win the fight again.

So are my happi-nesses mine,

brief victories invading time.

-- Johnny

Happiness is inseparable love

Our two souls therefore, which are one,

   Though I must go, endure not yet

A breach, but an expansion.

   Like gold to airy thinness beat.

If they be two, they are two so

   As stiff twin compasses are two:

Thy soul, the fixed foot, makes no show

   To move, but doth, if the other do;

And though it in the center sit,

   Yet when the other far doth roam,

It leans, and hearkens after it,

   And grows erect, as that comes home.

Such wilt thou be to me, who must,

   Like the other foot, obliquely run;

Thy firmness makes my circle just,

   And makes me end where I begun.

-- John Donne

Happiness is frequently old

 

Old truths, old laws, old boots, old books, and old friends are the best.

-- An old Polish proverb, often repeated by Russell Amos Kirk, the sage of Mecosta

Happiness is a Kitty Kegger

Happiness is Lefas Kalamata olive oil from Greece

The 3-liter can is only $19.99 at Russo's in Grand Rapids.

Happiness is the product of just one field

 

 

Give me, ye gods, the product of one field,

That so I neither may be rich nor poor;

And having just enough, not covet more.

-- John Dryden

Happiness is in nothing too little and nothing too much

 

 

Avoid extremes, and shun the faults of such

Who still are pleas'd too little, or too much.

-- Alexander Pope

Happiness is Curly as Field Marshall Herring saying "it's now in the middle of Novonder and we ain't there yet!"

Dictator Heilstone: "Now, that we have captured all of Starvania, we must take Great Mitten!"

Field Marshall Herring: "Yah-Yah!"

Dictator Heilstone: "Yah!"

Minister of Propaganda: "Yah, you were gonna Blitz-Kreeg Great Mitten by the middle of August!"

Field Marshall Herring: "Then you said, Septober, then Octember, it's now in the middle of Novonder, and we ain't there yet!"

Dictator Heilstone: "Well, Novonder, I didn't say what year!"

Minister of Propaganda: "I don't understand it, it's only twenty miles!"

Field Marshall Herring: "Yeah, I could skip it!"

Dictator Heilstone: "Then, skip it!"

-- from The Three Stooges, "I'll Never Heil Again", July 11, 1941

Happiness is June Carter and Johnny Cash singing "Darlin' Companion"

A great performance, here, from 1971. The song's composer, John Sebastian, performs it with Mama Cass, here, in 1969.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Happiness is the cheerleaders from Wildcats (1986): You ain't got no alibi, you ugly

Here.

Happiness is Dave Coverly's Achilles' heels

Happiness is culture, the tradition of enjoyment which knows how to make much out of little

"Culture [is] the tradition of enjoyment which knows how to make much out of little . . . and cannot be had for money. ... [T]heoreticians, poets, and musicians . . . these alone can thrive on no money."

-- Oswald Spengler, The Hour of Decision, 1934

Happiness is Keith Richard stinkin' up his very own library

For the book lover, happiness might be a library cake

I content me,

And from the sting of famine fear no harm,

Nor mind it, fed with better thoughts that feed

Me hung'ring more to do my Father's will.

-- John Milton

Happiness is chicken for 77 cents per pound

On rainy days alone I dine,

Upon a chick and pint of wine:

On rainy days I dine alone,

And pick my chicken to the bone.

-- Jonathan Swift

Happiness is Indian restaurant humor

Happiness is the story of the very first person to buy a Ford Mustang

Read it here.

Happiness is the Perseid meteor shower 2018, courtesy of the Virtual Telescope Project from Castel Santa Maria in Italy

Hosted by astrophysicist Gianluca Masi, here.

Click the images to enlarge.

Happiness is a homemade bean burrito, perhaps the best for you and cheapest meal you can make for yourself

I reckon the most expensive thing is the tortilla itself, while the whole shebang is something just north of 72 cents:

Flour tortilla: 33 cents

1 oz. sharp cheddar cheese: 18 cents

2/3 cup prepared pinto beans (13 cents) and basmati rice (4 cents): 17 cents

0.11 oz. spice mixture I prepare from bulk purchased salt, onion and garlic powders, chili powder, crushed red pepper, oregano leaves and cumin: 4.6 cents.

I can season a one pound batch of beans, which makes nine burritos, however I like for 41 cents doing it this way instead of 79 cents for an unadjustable store purchased packet, a savings of 48%.

The price of the beans shown is for a store purchased one pound bag at $1.19. At Sam's Club you can cut this to 63 cents per pound by buying the 12 lb. bulk bag. Per burrito that's 7 cents instead of 13 cents, bringing the whole enchilada down to 66 cents.

The price of a little canola oil for frying is not included.

Toppings are another matter entirely, which with the salsa are really the salad part of the meal.

Happiness is heart healthy sweet bing cherries, on sale last week for $1.99/lb

This week they're $3.99, alas.

A serving is about one dozen cherries, giving you 12% of your daily dietary fiber and 16% of your vitamin C. You also get vitamins A and K, folate, potassium, calcium, zinc, iron and copper, and some important anti-inflammatory compounds.

The dark red color of cherries comes from anthocyanidins and proanthocyanidins, which are compounds that help decrease inflammation in your body, according to Michael T. Murray, author of "The Condensed Encyclopedia of Healing Foods." A 2006 article published in the "Journal of Nutrition" reports that Bing cherries can reduce inflammation associated with cardiovascular disease and stroke. The study also suggests that eating cherries can lower your cholesterol. The beneficial compounds in cherries can ease the discomfort of arthritis as well, according to the U.S. Department of Agriculture Agricultural Research Service.

More at the link.

Happiness is homegrown, if you know when to strike

It is many a man's case to tire himself out with hunting after that abroad, which he carries about him all the while, and may have it better cheap at home.

-- Roger L'Estrange

Happiness is Rosie, the cat with her own pack of Huskies

Here!

Happiness is a Rush Limbaugh sendup

Rush Hudson Limbaugh,

a febrile font of faux pas,

everyday, from his throne,

behind a golden microphone,

grifts millions spoutin' hoo-ha.

-- Johnny